FIGHTS: Why Gina Carano vs. Ronda Rousey is a bad idea

RUMORED UFC MATCHUP BETWEEN CURRENT AND FORMER MMA CHAMPS WOULD DISAPPOINT
By
Bowie V. Ibarra

C'mon, folks.  Look at her.  You really thing she's going to give up the red carpet for getting punched in the face?

Gina Carano, one of the most amazing former female mixed martial artists, has gone on to bigger and better things outside of MMA.  She's had her own feature film with big names in Hollywood, and is on her way to being even bigger than one of her American martial arts predecessors, Cynthia Rothrock.

Why in the world would Gina, who hasn't had a match in years, consider stepping back into the cage like folks are speculating?  Why would she choose to go back and bust her ass in a gym, putting her body on the line when she has much better (and safer) opportunities to make money in the acting classes and auditions of Hollywood?

Why would she step back into the pit to fight this lady?

 

'Rowdy' Ronda Rousey.

 

This speculation and calls for Carano to return to the pits of MMA need to stop.  If you thought Rousey's last fight against the highly viable contender and Olympian Sara McCann was garbage, Carano/Rousey would be a massacre.

 

Folks, not taking anything away from Carano's fighting skill.  Carano on a bad day could still whip five of me all week.  Shit, five of you and five of me.  Twice on Sunday.

 

But she's been out of the cage for so long.  She's lost her edge.  Carano would not stand a chance against a hungry and sharp Rousey.  Acting classes and auditions have made Carano soft. I've been a part of many an acting class.  Trust me, there's nobody in any acting class anywhere that I've ever been in, whether they are a martial artist or not, that are going to win any MMA fights, much less a UFC-caliber fight.  Unless your name is Jeff Speakman, GTFOH.

 

To line Carano up against the best female martial artist in UFC today would be as disgusting as the Canelo/Angulo fight.  It would be totally one-sided, and a ridiculous money grab by Carano.  A massacre.

 

And truth is there's no sense in it.  There's plenty of current matchups for Rousey.  Cat Zigano lost her chance to fight her due to personal turmoil.  She earned her shot a while back.  And a McMann rematch should also take place.

 

But let's face it.  If competition gets thin, we need to petition the UFC and Dana to bring in the only woman who has been anywhere close to being as dominant as Rousey.  Perhaps even more so.  As long as she gets off the gas, it would be a great matchup.

And that woman's name is Cris 'Cyborg' Santos.

 

 

If you want to check out some books with actual competitive fights, check out the following.

'Iron Head and Other Stories' is chock full of great boxing matches and money fights by a group of very talented authors, including an entry called "Puncher's Chance" from ZBFbooks.com.  You can order it HERE.

 

Read about the fights of a Scottish pugilist making his way through MMA in the 'Pit Fighters' book series from ZBFbooks.com.  Get them HERE.

BOWIE V. IBARRA is the author of the acclaimed 'Down the Road' zombie horror series from Permuted Press.  He earned a BFA in Acting and a MA in Theatre History from Texas State University.  His latest titles explore superhero themes, including 'Codename: La Lechusa', 'Room 26 and the Army of Xulhutdul', and 'Tejano Star and the Vengeance of Chaplain Skull'. 

 

Network with Bowie at his official website, ZBFbooks.com, the leader in Tex-Mexploitation literature.

FIGHTS: UFC on Fox 5/Pacquiao vs. Marquez IV - A great night for fights

by Bowie Ibarra

If Elton John has taught me anything, it's that Saturday Night's Alright for Fighting.  And it proved true in this amazing night for combat sports.  ZombieBloodFights.com takes a look at the night.

UFC ON FOX 5

Mike 'Quick' Swick vs. Matt 'Immortal' Brown

The show started strong with these two UFC vets.  Matt Brown documented how he found salvation in MMA to keep him from drugs.  Swick was on a comeback from health issues.

It played out fine by me, with both guys fighting it out on the ground and feet with some MMA science.  Brown KO'd Swick, and it was a great knockout.  I was happy Swick got finished with such cruelty as I've had a problem with the dude when he tried to rename the 'guillotine choke' after himself.

BJ Penn vs. Rory McDonald

BJ Penn was fighting for relevance that has long passed him by.  Rory McDonald was not to be denied in the most douchey way possible.  The young Canuk showed little respect to the MMA legend in promos leading up to the fight, as well as the actual fight.  Penn could not handle McDonald's youthful offense and weight, and fans like myself will have to wait until another time to watch this cocky jerk from the great white north get his comeuppance.

It was nice, though, to hear the fans boo him as he tried to call out Carlos Condit.  He stood in the ring like a pendejo, wondering why everyone was booing him as he tried to be the 'respectful mixed martial artist' Mike Goldberg has tried to hammer into our brains for years.

Even Joe Rogan couldn't get him over with the crowd, hugging McDonald's nuts in front of the Seattle crowd that was having none of it.  Joe, we understand he's a talented young up-and-coming star, my man.  But he's an arrogant and disrespectful dick, and I just want to see someone whip his ass.  He would do well to work on some of those Canadian manners us ugly Americans are always told canuks have.

Maybe start by having him NOT cut 'Arrogant Young Heel' promos before a fight.

We see through your act, McDonald, you hoser.  Take off, eh.  You're loaded.

(insert caption here)

Ronda Rousey gets booked in her first UFC Match

Ronda Rousey is granted an official UFC Women's Title Belt to defend, and is booked for her first fight.  She's real excited about all that.










Alexander 'The Mauler' Gustafsson vs. Mauricio 'Shogun' Rua

This was a big test for Guffstasson.  Rua is not a man to be trifled with, event his far into his illustrious career.

But Gustafsson was able to weather the Brazillian's storm and shut down Rua with cruel strikes.  Well done, Gus.

UFC LIGHTWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP
Benson Henderson (C) vs. Nate Diaz

Benson Henderson is a great and dominating UFC Lightweight Champ.  Diaz has never been considered a class act, but he's a pretty good fighter.  He uses his tremendous reach to pepper foes with punches like his brother to great success.

But Benson showed why he was the champ, dominating Diaz on the feet and the ground.  As per the Diaz brothers, he talked trash and even flipped Henderson off, which was edited by Fox to avoid fines by the FCC.

Great job there putting such a loose cannon in the main event there, Dana.  The Diaz brothers are fighters through and through, and I enjoy watching them because they are pretty exciting fighters.  This sport is clearly a good career choice for them with their bad attitudes and lack any social skills or class.  They just need management.

PACQUIAO/MARQUEZ IV

From Juan Manuel Marquez's official Facebook page

The undercard was alright.  The Miguel Vasquez vs. Mercito Gesta was garbage, and was highlighted by an in-between rounds backstage shot of Juan Manuel Marquez getting his hands taped while watching the above UFC Fox 5 main event.

The Filipino Micheal Farenas fight against the returning Cuban Yuriorkis Gamboa was competative, with Farenas even knocking Gamboa down late.  Gamboa won by decision, but it was a hard-earned victory, as every time Gamboa had Farenas in trouble, the dude would fight his way back out.

50 Cent also came down from the roof before the Gamboa fight, singing a rap song.  He was strapped to cords that lowered him from the rafters.  Owen Hart is dead, yet 50 Cent continues to make records.  Life is unfair.

There were even celebrity guests at the event, including Mitt Romney, who looked so scared trying to mix in with the people.   I imagine him telling Pacquiao it was great that he was representing Brazil, or calling the cops when he met 50 Cent.  He was to sit in the crowd near Pacquiao's corner, which is a bad omen when you think about it.

After this match was the headliner.  But before that, we had to do the national anthems.  Apparently, the sound guy forgot the national anthem CD or MP3, because they were all done A Capella.  C'mon, guys.  In this day and age, no one could download the karaoke version of the songs?

Also, the US national anthem was sung as well after the Mexican and Filipino.  I guess for the referee, or what? 

The main event that was outstanding.  The guys came out swinging, and it hearkened back to their very first match years ago.

In the third round, after an exchange, Marquez knocked Pac down.  Then in the fifth, Pac answered by sending Marquez to the mat.

It was in the 6th that Marquez put Pac's lights out in the final seconds of the round.  Eating a punch from Pac, Marquez took the shot to deliver one of his own, an overhand right that clocked Pac straight in the mouth, sending him hopping off his feet and face first to the mat.

I swear, I thought he was dead.  He was out for a little bit, and it was reminiscent of Pac's fight against Ricky Hatton.  What goes around comes around, and Pac went out a warrior.

And that's the great thing about Pacquiao:  He is a warrior.  It's just what he does.  He fights.  He fights very well, and he knows it.  He said he would be fine with a rematch with Marquez.  That would be good.  He's a warrior.  Set the pay, and he'll do it.  That's his profession.

But it looks like first a match between Marquez and Brandon Rios is on the horizon, which sounds pretty good.

It's too bad that Pacquiao/Mayweather, the greatest fight to NEVER happen, never took place.  The cowardly loudmouth Mayweather dodged Pac for so long, making excuses, saying Pac was taking performance enhancing drugs.  He thinks Pac is a cheater.

Mayweather is a total douche, but he's good.  He's real good, and a great boxer and athlete.  You cannot take that away from him.

He's also smart.

He knows Pac could beat him back in the day.  He knew Marquez would beat him, too.  That's why he put on several extra pounds and paid off Marquez with $500,000 to get away with it on the night of their fight.  Some would call that cheating to win, in spite of the payoff.

Hell, he even cheap-shot KO'd the foolish Victor Ortiz when Ortiz was turning up the heat.  Granted, the shot was within the rules, but there's not one person who can say it was not a cheap shot, a shitty win, and a slap in the face to everyone that paid to see a boxing match.

But that's the kind of cowardly turd Mayweather is.  A cowardly turd who's an amazing boxer.

Last night, Pacquiao showed he's not a yellow bastard.  He showed he's a warrior that will fight the best fighters put in front of him.  And on that fateful night, when boxing history was made, not only did Pacquiao cement himself as one of boxing's immortal warriors, but so did Marquez.  And that's something Mayweather can never say.

==============

BOWIE V. IBARRA is the author of the 'Down the Road' zombie horror series from Permuted Press and Simon and Schuester.  His combat sports themed book, Pit Fighters: Baptism by Fire , features a boxer from Scotland who transitions to mixed martial arts competition.

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FIGHTS: RECAP - Strikeforce Tate/Rousey. Another arm bites the dust

by Bowie Ibarra

MMA can be hit or miss sometimes.  Strikeforce: Tate/Rousey was no exception.  The guy fights were alright.  But like a card featuring female fighters, for some reason, the girls always steal the show.  Here's a brief recap before the big female-headlining main event.

JACARE SOUZA vs. BRISTOL MARUNDE

Marunde was alright, but Jacare spent all three rounds playing with the outclassed Marunde like a cat plays with a mouse in a field.  It was all Jacare, who ended up submitting Marunde with a side choke in the third.  Luke Rockhold, the middleweight champ, was in the crowd.  It looks like the two are set to fight in the near future for the title Rockhold took from Jacare.

SCOTT "HANDS OF STEEL" SMITH vs. LUMUMBA SAYERS

No, not Leo Sayers.  Lumumba Sayers.

'When I need you/I just lift you up and I throw you...'

They called Scott Smith a 'comeback artist'.  I don't know if I want to be known as a 'comeback artist'.  That means to me that I am good at getting my ass kicked and end up winning by pulling it out of my ass.  Forget that, man.  I want to be the dude that jab-jab-crosses and German Suplexes my way to victory.

So when your reputation is being a come-backer, that's a trainride that comes to a stop pretty quick.  Especially when you're on a three-fight skid.

And that's what happened here.  Sayers ended up taking the victory locking in a Guillotine after a tremendous 'Air Raid' style slam.  Victory to Sayers, who, I imagine, felt like dancing.

"SEMTEX" PAUL DALEY vs. KAZUO MISAKI

I'm not sure where the Paul Daley I once knew went.  I just wish he'd come back.  He used to let it all hang out and just bring the pain when he fought.  He needed it against this guy from Japan, Kazuo Misaki, who brings it every time he fights.  Any dude that comes in all keyed up to a headache-inducing drum-and-bass techno explosion  is a dude you better bring your A-Game for.

But Daley didn't.  While not necessarily riding a bike from the middle of the second round all the way through the third, Daley made no effort to push the fight.  Especially when he should have after opening up Misaki with an elbow on the ground.  Instead, Misaki pushed the fight to the end and took the decision victory in spite of a face caked in blood.

"THE PUNK" JOSH THOMPSON vs. KJ NOONS

Thompson dominated for the entire match.  Not much to say about this one, except Thompson dominating for more than 10 minutes on the ground in a 15-minute bout.  Even he said it was a 'shit' performance.  Hey, that's him.  Not me.

But it was.

MIESHA "TAKEDOWN" TATE vs. "ROWDY" RONDA ROUSEY

Okay, here it is.  Girls, man.  Just brutal.

So, the chisme is that both were kind of chill until Tate decided to literally get in Rousey's face at the weigh ins.  They were all smiles until this moment, which made Rousey shove Tate's face away from hers with her forehead.

Allegedly, Rousey claims Tate called for a fine for Rousey trying to 'headbutt' her during the weigh-in.  That didn't sit well with Rousey, who thought that if Tate was going to go 'all hard', she should follow through.  The call for a fine was a 'bitch' move.

So, thanks to Gina Carano setting a standard for 'looks that kill' for the competitors in a women's division for the rest of eternity, they had to doll up the two main eventers.

  Here's Ronda before the main event.

Here's Ronda on her way to collect a body part, looking like she's on her way to a casting call for an 'Assassin's Creed' live-action movie.

Here's Miesha looking like a foreign super-villain.

Ay vill destrroy herr.

For fun, here's Miesha looking like Wonder Woman.

And here's Miesha on her way to the ring.

She's looking like a female John Cena, clapping hands with the crowd on the way to the cage to face her destiny.  It would have been cooler if she wore the Wonder Woman getup to the ring.

Here's Sarah Kaufman, sitting cageside.  She's the former champ, who won a hard-fought battle earlier that night to get a shot at the winner.

This is the face of the winner.

Here's the face of the chick that lost.

So, champ Tate and challenger Rousey threw down.  Tate pounded Rousey with fists early, but Rousey closed the distance and got the clinch.  Rousey set up some great Judo-style throws, including this one, pictured below.

SCIENCE!

Rousey ended up cinching in an armbar.  Here's how it started.

Here's how it ended.  Notice the look of intense pain on Tate's face.

And the first moments of Rousey's victory were spent adjusting her biker shorts.

Tate was proud, and was not going to show any pain.  Not even a tear.  Just slobber from her mouthpiece that was removed from her mouth.  

And here's Sarah Kaufman, looking on with a joyful bruised and scabby smile about her upcoming money fight and the possibility of having her arm adjusted.

Here's the victor, looking on at the remains of her foe like a murderous artisan admiring her handiwork.

And the best part was when she said, in effect, that she doesn't feel bad for taking Tate's arm home because Tate had it coming.

And great camerawork to get this shot as Rousey refuses to bury the hatchet for taking it to Tate like she did.

Here's what I learned yet again:  Don't mess with women.  There's a beautiful cruelty to them that no man could ever match.

Face it, guys.  There's girls that are more hardcore than you are, and I'm not just talking about these ladies, or Megumi Kudo and Shark Tsuchiya in their 

No Rope 200 Volt Double Hell Double Barbed Wire Barricade Double Landmine Glass Crush Electrical Barbed Wire Death Match 

To be honest, I don't know why people talk trash about Rousey getting a shot too early.  She's a freakin' OLYMPIC MEDALIST.  She is literally one of the best in the world at Judo, a great and old grappling sport.  Why not give her a title shot? 

Well, she proved it Saturday.  In a sport where one week a dude could be working 8-5 at a tire garage, and fighting in a cage for a respected title the next (read: Rodgers/Emelianenko), I think an Olympian can get the benefit of the doubt in MMA.

 

Check out the scrap here, then check out the books below.

 

Support the blog by picking up one of these combat sports titles today in paperback or Kindle.

'Pit Fighters: Baptism by Fire' and 'Pit Fighters: Double Cross' are combat sports-themed book that features fights from the early days of MMA, and plenty of underground money fights.  You've got to check them out, and they're available on Kindle or paperback today.

 

 

BOWIE V. IBARRA is the author of the 'Down the Road' zombie horror series from Permuted Press and Simon and Schuster.  His latest story, 'Tejano Star and the Vengeance of Chaplain Skull' is a Tex-Mexploitation superhero story in the tradition of 'Machete' and 'Black Dynamite'.  Get it in paperback or Kindle today.

 

Enjoy the blog?  Share it with your friends using the 'Facebook' or 'Twitter' buttons below.

Network with Bowie and explore his Tex-Mexploitation stories at his personal website, ZombieBloodFights.com.